Comments on: The One BIG Reason People Fail in Healing

By: Jim Tolles

Jim Tolles — Mon, 07 Sep 2020 17:09:30 +0000

It all starts with surrender. So acceptance inherently embraces wherever you are in your emotional maturation process. As you accept where you are, now you can inquire into the emotion. You can ask yourself, "Why are you disappointed? What are you trying to get from the boy you invited? What aren't you getting that your ego thinks it wants?"

Then you can focus on your body and see where you are holding any physical or emotional tension. Breathe into it, and see where things take you from there.

But again and again, it comes back to surrender. You have to allow any and all thoughts, emotions, and sensations to come without trying to control them, stop them, or feed into them. You do that by continually returning to awareness.

Let me know if that helps.

By: Anonymous

Anonymous — Mon, 07 Sep 2020 17:06:23 +0000

Hi, Jim. Thanks for keeping this blog. I'm not ready to work with a spiritual teacher like you yet but have gotten lots of good information. I have a quick question you may be able to point to - you've said many times throughout the blog that you need to embrace your feelings and experiences instead of embrace them. In other places, you say emotions are an ego choice and we need to be able to see that we have a choice in how we feel. How can you tell the difference between an emotion that needs to be felt and acknowledged and one that is a choice you're making unconsciously? For example, if a boy I like doesn't accept my invitation to dinner and I get disappointed and whiny, how do I know whether I am making a choice to have that emotion or whether I need to process it and feel it?

Thanks!